The big what ifs in life

So you’ve made the decision of having a baby. The amount of decisions that come afterwords is mind-boggling, and I am sure it doesn’t end for the rest of your life after making the decision of bringing a new life into the world.

There are the obvious decisions of the colour of the nursery, what to ask for on your registry. Then there are the things you start to think about that you did know you would think about, and the decisions with the big what ifs in life come up. What if I can’t provide, what if one of us dies, what if both of us die. What if something unfortunate happens to the child (god forbid), what if the child wants to go to school? Will there be enough money? Will there be loving people in their life to care for them? These sound like morbid thoughts but some planning now will greatly relieve stresses later in life.

I honestly can crawl into bed tonight and sleep soundly knowing that most of these questions are answered. Brian and I turn out have made some smart choices about our life insurance. So if we suddenly go, things will be ok. We have guardians picked out, however they do not know who they are yet and they made the cut with higher scrutiny and discussion then the president takes to pick his right hand people. We have a plan for an education and investing so that tuition to medical school will not bankrupt us. We have made a plan for the baby’s life insurance (which sounds morbid), however later on if there are health issues the child will greatly appreciate it. I know this from experience because my parents made this same choice when I was born and because of health issues, it is very hard for me to get life insurance. However because they started this policy when I was born I was able to continue it, with no questions asked. (Ok so I sound like a commercial there but it truly made a difference.)

These questions also brought up how much do I love my child, and grandchildren. Do I want to spoil them and make sure they are set for life? Or do I want them to make a life of their own. It made us think because we could have set up a policy that if the child lived to be 100 they would have an almost $600,000 payout to their beneficiaries. So we work hard, to provide for our grandchildren because at that point I will be long gone and not be able to use any of that money. Our child will be gone, and what if I don’t like my grandchildren? What if they turn out to be drug addicts, $600,000 would buy a lot of smack. I won’t be around to control how that money is spent. I think we have found a balance, and are happy with our plan. Who would have thought we would have to think about those 100 years away. Our choices now will affect generations to come. We know our choices affect those around us and the world, but to think so far away is mind-blowing.

So as I settle in for the night, I think of all the choices we have made already for the child. What I ate, and drank. The doctors I saw, the medicine I took. I think of the budgets and the conversations, the sacrifices we will be making and those we already have. I will go to sleep knowing so far for our baby we have made many good choices and if we keep this up, I am sure our child will be just fine.

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