When Life Makes You Sick

I’m exhausted.

I’m exhausted to the point that if I was a celebrity I would be checking into a posh Hollywood hospital for a few days or rest.

Unfortunately I’m not a celebrity or a millionaire so taking a few days to rest is not an option. I’m a busy Mom who will have to settle for trying to rest, thinking I might get some and then get body slammed by a 40 pound boy, who follows it up with “Mommy Alright?”

Honestly Mommy Isn’t Alright. Mommy needs to work less, Mommy needs help with the housework. Mommy needs to get more then 6 hours of sleep a night and Mommy needs a break.

I left work early on Saturday because a sudden burst of dizziness, lightheaded feeling and not being able to keep my eyes focused made working impossible. I was also told I was as white as a ghost. I tried eating, drinking and resting with little improvement.

Now after a full day of these feeling, sleeping for 12 hours there is improvement but only when I lie in bed. I’ve not been to the doctor yet because I know exactly why I feel this way. Exhaustion, stress and anxiety. I know exactly how to fix it too. I need to wipe my plate clean, take a few days to sleep as much as possible, breathe deeply and do somethings to unwind.

As I type what I need to do I laugh to myself because only in my wildest dreams can that be accomplished. Many people are quick to point out the long weekend this weekend. Time to relax, unfortunately I work the entire weekend.

My plan for nap time is to limit the time at my desk to 1 hour, then nap for 1 hour. I have to start dinner by 4 to make sure I can eat it and get ready for work. I have to put time in at my desk because I promised delivery of a product today at the latest and still haven’t done so.

Many people will respond to this post with many suggestions on how to slow down, manage my time better or tell me I need to start saying No. Unfortunately not the full story is posted on here and things are deeper and more complicated then they seem.

This week is brutal, maybe there is some light in next week. I’ve learned though not to hold my breath. I look back at having my wisdom teeth out where I planned to be in bed for 3 days and in reality I only had less then 24 hours, and then I was back to life.

I’ve discovered sometimes you can’t have what you want, and won’t get what you need.

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